Monipeloli

This morning we had our counseling class gave a presentation on whether being gay or lesbian was a choice? I explained the Kinsey scale and how some people fell somewhere on the scale. I also presented some political views from both Botswana and the United States. Gay or lesbian acts are illegal in Botswana and can be punished with prison time. I explained to the class how homosexuality is still a debating topic in our country however we have come a long way with equal rights. I was not surprised with the presentations of the other students in our counseling class. Many of them were opinionated and they stated homosexual stereotypes as facts, Jen and I felt it was not our place to correct them because this might be a cultural difference. We felt the only way to educate them without being disrespectful was during our presentations so I tried my best to describe something I was quite familiar with, the laws of attraction. I explained how you can’t choose who you are attracted to but being homosexual is a choice because you can choose to act on the person you might be attracted to whether they be male or female.

A few of the presentations were very open and honest and they looked at all possibilities including research and studies that have been done on the topic of homosexuality. I was tempted to ask questions to those who said homosexuality might be cause out of frustration of the opposite sex or because they wanted to be different from everyone else. I like how one girl did pick up on how homosexuality used to be in the DSM as a mental disorder however it was taken out after more studies were done exempting the possibility.

In the afternoon Vicki had promised to take us to Montepeloli which is a village about 60 kilometers from Gabs. It ended up taking us about an hour and twenty minutes to get there. We saw some very interesting scenery on our journey though. There were random goats, cows and donkeys crossing the road at free will. There were children walking up and down the side dirt roads bare foot. It was sad passing hundreds and hundreds of people trying to make a living on the side of the road by selling individual pieces of candy. Many of their homes were one room huts with straw roofs. As we came closer to the Lifeline center at Montepeloli we passed hundreds of school kids just getting at out of school and walking down the road venturing home. As we came closer to where we thought was going to the Montepeloli Lifeline center the paved road turned into dirt and the car ride became very bumpy from there.

When we pulled up we realized that we were visiting a private school which had a Lifeline Center in it. As we waited for Vicki’s friend to come I asked to use the restroom and they gave me a disgruntled look and I didn’t know why until I realized they do not have running water so until they received water my urine would have to sit in the toilet and mellow. We waited a few minutes until two women walked in with huge smiles and open arms speaking Setswana. One of them was the principal who started the school five years ago. She took us into a classroom a few rooms down and we sate in a small eight by eight corner, this was their “Lifeline Center”. Her and Vicki began talking and catching up on what’s new. She then told Vicki that she had taken in three kids from the school because they needed guidance. The three children all coming from different families were dealing with their parents going through a divorce and she took them in so they did not get caught up in the custody battle. She finds that this is the best way for the parents to agree without manipulating the child. The forth child she took in was a twelve year old orphan whose twin sister just passed away from Aids. When the two were born one was born HIV positive and the other HIV negative. She discussed with us that the child has not shown much emotion over her sister’s death and she was going to let her grieve on her own until she feels the time is right. She also mentioned how many of the children that are born with HIV at the school get frustrated and upset. They act this way because since the day they are born they have to take ARV’s to slow down the HIV process the frustration comes in because they wonder why they have this virus, “we didn’t ask for this, we didn’t do anything wrong”. Good question children. Jen and I looked at each other in disbelief but reality quickly hit us when the girl walked in to meet us with her chin held high and a beaming smile. They have to teach these kids to not grieve over their loved ones otherwise they would be grieving rather than enjoying their own life. I understand this concept but it’s hard to say goodbye to a loved one in passing especially when all you have in your life is a twin sister. The principal, I forgot her name but I will find out before I leave, runs the school with over 230 children, eight teachers, limited funds, clothing, food and teachers. She also takes four orphans home with her every night to take care for on top of her own three biological children not to mention she is a single parent that recently went through a divorce, talk about strength. This woman enjoys every moment she has with these kids and enjoys life to the fullest while providing more than any one else can imagine.

The children came in and played their African instruments for us which I was able to get a video of.

They were amazing and full of spirit I felt blessed to be sitting in their presence at that very moment.

Presidents Day (Our day off)

We have the day off today for Presidents Day. I am proud to say that I have Barak Obama making decisions in office and that he is doing his best to provide equality and more healthcares for everyone in our nation. After breakfast Mandy and I decided to go to River Walk mall with a few others to go shopping. I bought a shirt for the Rascal Flatts concert next month and another t-shirt. When we got back we finished our movie 7 pounds with Will Smith, it was a very touching movie with a good message. We then decided as a group to go to Gaborone Game Reserve to see some animals since the anticipation for the Game Drive at the end of our trip was becoming too much. On the drive we saw deer, antelope, ostrich, warthogs and monkeys. It was very relaxing and got us all excited to go up north and see the bigger and exciting animals. We stopped to go to the restroom before leaving the park and we found an area where there were about fifteen to twenty monkeys jumping around playing with each other and climbing trees. There was even one who jumped onto a movie jeep and stood on the side mirror as the driver sat and waited for the monkey to leap off the car.

When we left the Game Reserve we headed to Khali Park near game city to go for a hike up a mountain to watch the sunset. The path was very rocky and unsteady luckily everyone made it up safely. When we reached the top we were all left speechless at the beautiful surrounding below us. We took many pictures and climbed the highest rocks possible to get the best pictures. The pictures I am posting will explain our view better than me putting it in words.

Katie, Meg and I chilling at the top of the mountain.

Amazing view, you can see for miles.

Beautiful sunset!!!

I call this picture "Mandy and Zach tackle the globe"

We were all starving by the time we reached the bottom of the mountain so we decided to go to Hagan’s Irish Pub for dinner. The five girls and I at my table decided to order a flaming Lamborghini which was three different shots mixed into one but you had to drink it with a straw while it was lit on fire and then the shots were added. I was the genie pig of the group and went first while Dr. Pillay took pictures. It was quite thrilling but I got scared when I became to feel heat coming up the straw and quit a tad bit too early. Everyone at our table followed after me and loved every minute of it, the shot only came out to be about $5 or $6 a piece.

Dr. Pillay also sat at our table which gave me the opportunity to talk a little bit about the program and compare it to past study abroad experiences. To my surprise we seem to be a lot more laid back than most groups. I think that might have to do with having a larger number of people and this allow us to have more outlets. I think another part which might contribute to this is that a lot of us already know each other and that the meetings before hand got us familiar with one another.

Our service at Hagan’s made the overall experience below satisfactory. Our food took two hours from the time we got there and they didn’t have two separate things that people in our group had ordered but failed to mention until the time we were expecting our food. Our drivers became frustrated and eventually came in from the parking lot and “accidentally” put their drinks on our tab. When Mandy confronted them they said they asked the waiter if that would be easier. First of all who wants to pay for their bus drivers alcohol drinks right before he drives you home, second the guy Mandy asked has been shady in the past with money so it was good we asked. While we waited in the parking lot I was made aware that Meg Mealy has an official stocker. A few weeks ago Meg was talking to a gentleman at the bar and the guy’s sister wanted the two to date. Meg never called him after leaving that night and just so happens she ran into Meg at Hagan’s that night. Well she followed us out of the club that night and was looking under cars trying to find Meg so that should could go meet up with her brother. The people of Botswana are persistent and come on very strong if you cannot tell already. We had very adventurous day and I thinkg everyone on the trip had a great experience.

Conversation with Dr. Pillay at dinner

At dinner last night we had a discussion with Dr. Pillay after dinner that I found very enlightening. He explained how he grew up in South Africa and what it was like to have four different segregated communities living in their society. He also mentioned how if anyone was caught violating their segregation laws how people would be prosecuted. I cannot fathom how cruel society might have treated people of a different race during his childhood. Another point that cleared up some of the racism for me was our discussion of how government divided up the funds. Caucasian’s received about eighty percent of the funding, Indian heritage received about 5 to 7 percent, Colored (mixture of white and black) people as they were called received about ten percent and then Indigenous Africans received the lowest amount of money in the budget with less than five percent even though they were the majority of the population in South Africa at the time. There was one college for Indians, Blacks and Coloreds and many university and colleges for Caucasians. The government had it fixed so that the other three races were not empowered. Dr. Pillay discussed how he was a rare case to success because he was granted a scholarship by Archbishop Desmond Tutu. Without this scholarship he would not have had the funs for the education he needed.

I was shocked when he explained how much he has developed since he was young and how he to had prejudices. I find it fascinating how he took that anger and education and used it to help people understand their own cultural biases. Dr. Pillay set a goal of helping people think about and change their cultural awareness through education. I can personally say he has done that for me. Where I was a year ago and where I am now are completely different. I always wondered why he would want to live in a small community like Athens where there might be a lot of racism or misunderstanding. Now I understand that he wanted to take students who are misinformed or misunderstand cultures and help them come to the realization that we all have biases and prejudices its how we deal with them and how we over come them that matter. I always thought of myself as culturally aware but now I realize that I just thought I understood different races, not culture.

After my trip to Africa I can say I understand that culture is more than skin color, more than heritage, its how one views their own life determined by their morals and values and that each and every individual on earth has their own culture. Although we do have cultural norms in a society that make up generalized cultures, I like to think of it like religion. People of the same religion might have the same belief however some may approach aspects of their life differently and that no one sees every circumstance exactly the same. My favorite quote from the night came from Dr. Pillay “Where there is different races, there will always be racism. Where there is different gender there will always be sexism. Thank you Dr. Pillay for helping me see that through academic course work and this amazing experience in Africa.

Counseling Class with Belly Dancer

Monday morning we had our counseling class and we were supposed to have our presentations. I wasn’t nervous although I didn’t put any research into my topic “how do you become Gay or a Lesbian?” and also the politics that surround the issue. I found it funny how out of six people in my group none of them felt comfortable enough talking about Gay and Lesbian politics. Does it have anything do with the fact that it is illegal to be homosexual in Botswana. You will be punished and taken to prison if you show a homosexual act in public. Vicki taught a lesson for the first hour and a half about Trust, taking care of self before you can help others, finding underlying issues and how to deal with low self esteem. After her lecture we had our presentations and one of the girls presenting played a hypnotherapy CD for us which I found very relaxing and positive. I spoke to her afterward and asked her if she could help teach me how to hypnotize people and she agreed to give me a book and a CD that will help teach me. She also brought in a belly dancer to perform a few dances and show us how to do the movements. I have a few videos of these but it was very interesting.

I think I could find it very useful to help hypnotize people’s train of thought to erase negative thoughts and replace the things that trigger those thoughts with positive feelings and emotions.

Nanogang Secondary School

After class we ate lunch and then went to a near by school called Nanogang which is a secondary school for children fifteen to seventeen. I was extremely excited to do this because I haven’t experienced working with kids in a counseling center. At first the students were very shy and observing of our behavior. We started by saying how we felt today, who our role model at the moment is and why. I explained how Barak Obama is my biggest role model at the moment because exemplifies the kind of hope our country needs and shows the leadership qualities that I admire. I explained how I am not going to agree with everything he might do in office but I understand what his presence means to our country and other countries around the world. I was kind of shocked when going around the room how many of the Nanogang students told me their role models were American icons.

One student also said Obama is his biggest role model while others claim JayZ, T.I., Martin Luther King Jr., Beyonce and about half the class said Oparah. All of their answers were for different reasons but overall because they want to make positive impact in the world. They also had to say what they wanted to be when they grow up and many of them said lawyers, doctors, surgeons, writers and only one of about twenty of the children mentioned money as their motivation. I figured that would be the most important issue for children who grew up learning in a room that was way too small for the number of kids, no air condition for the summer when temperatures reach the hundred degree mark or who have holes in their school sweaters.

The goal of them meeting twice a week was to talk about the problems of their life and to do self development. I got the impression that a lot of these kids are already adults and that they have to be the man or woman in their household because their parents are not reliable and their siblings rely on them or they might have problems taking orders from their older sibling for that very reason. This was these kids support system. Their homework was to do a family tree and describe each family member.

It was devastating to hear these children draw a family tree with empty tree branches because their uncles, cousins, parents, brothers, sisters have passed away. They are not even allowed to say the word death, they have to say passed away and if they slip the D word they are quickly corrected. Another thing I found shocking was that majority of the kids did not know their uncles and aunts names because it is found to be improper to call them anything other than uncle or aunt. I explained how in the U.S. I call my uncle, Uncle Ed. They found this to be disrespectful in their culture. So these kids grow up surrounded by their relatives and do not even know their real first name. I would say ninety five percent of the children were raised by a single parent and many of them did not know or associate with their father. I couldn’t imagine a family tree where I did not know anyone’s name. At the end of the session we went around the room and each person had to talk about what their goals in life are and what they are doing to achieve these goals. By this time I had moved around the room and decided to sit near a very cute little girl name Faith. She was sixteen; she came from a broken home and wanted to be a lawyer when she grew up so she could protect people from being taken advantage of. Here is a picture of Faith Simon and I after our three hour session.

The first girl to speak mentioned how she wanted to write a book one day and she is taking steps by reading books and learning as much as she possibly can about writing. Another girl mentioned how she wanted to start her own orphanage. Then there was this frail little girl that was about 4’10 and couldn’t have weighed more than 100 pounds. She stood up and told the class she has already written the book and has taken it to many different publicists trying to get her book published. Her book was about violence against youth.

She is on the bottom row second person from the right (next to the boy with the white bookbag). After she mentioned this Faith leaned over and whispered in my ear that maybe I could get her book published. I told her I didn’t know any publishers or I would. It’s inspiring to see a girl who couldn’t be older than fifteen already following her dream and acting on it.

At the end of the session I told them that I wanted to have a picture with them, they were eager to get as many photos taken of them as possible. This is why they are appearing to hang all over me trying to get their face in the picture thinking that it will become popular in the United States. I hope some day I write my own book and these kids picture can be in it. They have the motivation and ability to do so much if they are just given the opportunity. My impression from what I have learned about students like this in Botswana is that most of them will try to accomplish these goals, some will find help whether it be in continuum education or someone giving them a chance at a prestigious job disappointing as it may be the fact is few will succeed. The girl to the left of me in this picture dreams of moving to America one day.

I couldn’t help but sit in this room and look around at all the children smiling and wonder which ones is HIV positive? What children here will not make it to their twenties and why it has to happen to them? When I talk to my peers about their organizations we cannot tell who has HIV and who is healthy but then you hear the occasionally story of the kid who took a half hour more to get out of bed in the orphanage after their nap. My friends who are working at a Salvation Army sight said they fed the kids lunch Monday and that they were required to bring their own bowls just to receive a serving of what looked like canned dog meat. Many of these kids brought crayon boxes and some used card board boxes. I am getting goose bumps right now thinking about these kids eating like animals and yet one child even had the decency to share the only meal he was going to eat that day with one of the volunteers from our program. Chris felt privileged and since the Salvation Army couldn’t provide enough for the volunteers he graciously accepted the Childs invitation. I understand there are still kids in the U.S. who go starving and that this is a worldwide issue my mind goes in circles when I think of an answer to world hunger. I feel this problem is not incurable but it would take a major shift in global consciousness, one that I think people in our generation or the generations ahead are ready for.

Today was by far one of the most rewarding days for me in throughout our trip. I feel like I can draw inspiration from these kids.

If I ever lack motivation I will remember back to the young girl who wrote a book and is not giving up on publishing it. I will remember a young twenty year old opening a pawn shop just to get the experience of starting his own business in hopes of owning his own company one day. This reminds me of last year when I would be working out at ping and in my head I’d complain of being tired or unmotivated and then I would look up at the track and see a young man moving as fast as he can with his arm crutches because his legs were not strong enough to stand on his own two feet. I can draw motivation to do things using other people’s strengths; this is something I have acquired over the years. I find this to be one of my truest blessings. I’m more concerned with how I am going to take this experience back to the U.S. than I am soaking it all in. I feel inhumane if I were to see the things I have seen and hear the stories I have heard not do anything about it. I know some peoples response to this is well it’s not our problem but it is. If we don’t take care of each other the end result will be worse off than the effort it takes to help one another. If your raft is sinking in open water would you throw people overboard to make it lighter for a short period of time before eventually sinking or would you collectively come up with a plan to solve the problem at hand and work together to save everyone?

My 24th Birthday

Saturday was my 24^th birthday. Where have the years gone?

If theres one thing you should know about it me its that I love celebrating my birthday so I wanted to make sure I did it up right in Africa. We hung out all day doing laundry and visiting Main Mall to buy some gifts. I treated myself to a Botswana t-shirt and a little statue. After that I decided to hand wash my laundry because its been two weeks and I needed some fresh clothes to wear to work. For dinner we went to the Grand Palm Resort as I mentioned early ate a wonderful dinner and had live music. The entertainer was very creative and amusing with his music. He played Rihanna “Under my Umbrella”, John Denver “Country Road” and Happy Birthday to me. While we were waiting for the bus to come pick us up I decided to gamble a little bit more and while we were there Clare was approached by a middle aged Chinese woman who was shocked by her beauty. She pulled her around the casino by hand desperately trying to find her husband so she could introduce her. She kept talking about how pretty her body, hair and smile were.

It was quite unusual and fascinating so I took it upon myself to ask her if I should get a picture. By this time Clare was being pushed to her limit of kindness but she knew the lady meant well. I took a picture which she wanted to see about six different times and then she left for about ten minutes. She came back with her husband and demanded I take another photo and email it to her. Its official, Clare has her own fan club now. One of the most thoughtful gifts I recieved was from our guide Karabo which was a Botswana Jersey with my Setswanna name on the back "Thabo" which means always happy.

The night was amazing and I could not imagine spending my birthday in Africa any better way.

Meeting in the Mountains

My Boss Vicki, Jen and I

When Jen and I arrived Friday to work we had to be there a half hour early which was alright but we did not know what was in store for us that day. When we arrived at the office our supervisor Vicki made it aware that we would be traveling to Mokolodi for a meeting about HIV/Aids awareness. We weren’t very enthused but remained open minded. I became very ecstatic when we pulled up to the Mokolodi Game Reserve and learned that our meeting was on the top of a mountain on a Game Reserve. We had to take a twenty minute Game Drive to get there and ended up seeing an Ostrich, Antelope, Warthog, Impala and Judo (not sure about the spelling but it resembled a buck with two very long twisty horns.) The driver was very nice and allowed us time to stop and take pictures.When we got to the top of the mountain to “World View” where the conference was being held we were left breathless.

We could see for miles, mountains, Gaborone Dam, wildlife walking around the Reservation and also rivers, houses, lakes and neighboring cities. I forget how high they said we were but the temperature differed about fifteen degrees from the bottom of the mountain to the top. I don’t know why but I decided to only wear a black dress t-shirt and my dress paints. I was freezing the entire time I was there.

Half way during the lecture I left the conference room to go find a gift shop to buy a jacket or sweat shirt and during my search I ran into a worker who asked what I was looking for. When I told him I couldn’t stand the coldness he offered me his jacket to wear and told me the gift shop is too expensive and over priced. That is just how friendly these people are that they are willing to give you the shirt off their back and ask for nothing in return. I have friends in the United States who find it troubling and provoking to give a homeless man their left over food. What does this say about how we treat strangers in the U.S., fend for yourself is what the social norm is. We are a giving country in the large scheme of things but I feel like it’s the little things that we take for granted. I plan on changing this part of my everyday life when I get back.

I want to volunteer more, learn more, teach more, inspire more and get involved more. Today when I was making my breakfast tea the back of my sugar packet had a quote on it “Be the change you want to see in the world”. This means if you want the planet to be healthier recycle. If you think there should be less homeless don’t criticize and ridicule them donate, volunteer learn why they are homeless and help them to over come it. So many times I think about how people call themselves Christians yet they are so worried about not having so they forget to give to others. Healthcare is an important example, why should people with money pay a higher premium for others who don’t have jobs to receive healthcare. Isn’t well-being a divine right? Do you think Jesus would say lets help the poor man so long as it doesn’t take away from what I have earned? Sure there are going to be people who abuse the privilege but let God deal with them in his own way don’t over generalize the poverty population because of a few. Stay open minded to the possibility and do your research.

During the conference there were many issues which were brought up that I could not understand because questions were being asked and answered in Setswana. The overall purpose of the meeting was to promote the question “Who is in your sexual network”. They want to get people thinking on a larger scheme of things. I was a little disturbed because they want you to be more aware of your partner and what they might be hiding. I was disturbed at how they presented the information. They spoke as though you should trust less and observe more of what your partner is doing. I don’t know how to tackle the rising problem of HIV/Aids but I don’t think not trusting your partner is the way to approach it. Another problem they have is promoting condom use but not how to put it on. You don’t just give a pilot a plane and don’t teach him how to fly it.

After the presentations we ate dinner overlooking the beautiful scenery. We had to wait for about an hour until a jeep came to get us but I didn’t mind. When we left Mokolodi we stopped by Game city so I could buy a jacket seeing as how it was very chilly here in the morning and evenings. During the day it got up to about 70 degrees and low of 30’s. This wasn’t how I predicted African weather to be like. It even snowed in Johannesburg, South Africa on Friday. From Game City Vicki took us to her house so that we could see where she lived. Jen and I were both shocked to see that she lived in a very large and well decorated house. She introduced her son who is about seventeen and lives in a little guest house in the back of property which has its own living room, bathroom and kitchen. The inside of here house was very eloquent and she even had her own house maid which I guess is becoming more common in Southern Africa.